Alright, time for the Immodium!! Not too bad, just enough to be annoying. But enough about that. Last night I had my little pity party and am ready for the long haul. Luis and I had a heart to heart and we decided to push his ticket back to the 25th and I am going to wait for him and the baby here! It's hard because they have their schedule here and at times I feel in the way, but they are very kind about it. Last night a woman came to wash clothes. She was at it for hours and worked so hard, wasing and wringing and hanging them up, only to be greeted by rainstorms today. I helped rush out to pluck the exposed clothing off the lines and hang them up under cover. Can't stop the washing for a little rain. Which by the way is not just a little rain. We are getting showers off and on and running to the bathroom is always an experience. Tomorrow I am going to a store they say is a lot like Costco, so I have that to look forward to. And, their cable here plays Law and Order and CSI and ER!!

When I began this blog, I really wanted it as a documentation, or journal, of this whole experience. I guess that means the good,bad and the ugly. Well, I have a little ugly. Originally, luis's niece (the birth mother) told us she was due August 27th, then she told us she was due July 25th and that was verified by Luis's mom who said that the baby has dropped and that she has been experiencing contractions. Luis and I scrambled to buy a ticket for me and I gave my notice to my job. We planned for me to come down first and stay in Guatemala City to wait for the baby and Luis would come down a week later and then we would be able to start all the legal proceedings. Since we decided to adopt, we knew we would have some responsibility to the birth mother and the baby to make sure both were healthy, so we sent money every week. Not a ton, but enough to live on. On accasion she would call asking for a little extra to cover a doctors appt., and we would gladly send it to her. Just found out yesterday that she is back to her original due date and would like a t.v and dvd player!!!So now I am here early and will have to wait for about a month now until she is born. Luis and I both feel as if we've been played and right now it is unsafe for me to travel by myself to Puerto Barrios (5 hours by bus) so I must stay in Guatemala City. We have decided that Luis will push back his arrival date and will come closer to the due date, since he is an intregal part of the legalities. I have no problem with the tv and dvd player part, but lately I've been feeling a little taken advantage of. Dealing with family is a delicate process and so far we have been playing fair, but it is frustrating when the other party is not. Don't get me wrong, I am just fine here and I am enjoying Luis's ex-sister-in-law and his nieces but I also like my own bed too. Last night it began to rain pretty heavy and as I was lying in bed listening to the rain hit the aluminum roof, I was also thinking that to get to the bathroom I would have to jump some puddles. Sorry if I am complaining, but I miss my husband. I still feel like this is the right thing to be doing and I know that Heavenly Father wants me to be a mother and I know that He will look out for me. I am looking forward to this baby girl and dressing her in all the pink clothes that I have brought!!

Day two into my Guatemala trip has me reunited with my luggage and living "as the natives do". This morning I woke up to roosters and motorcycles, and heat. Although, its not near as bad as I had thought. I am staying with Luis's nieces and their mom and grandma and grandpa and the occasional stray kitty. Very nice people and very patient as I stumble thru my spanish. (the girls speak fluent english, so it's not too bad) I do think that I have contracted black lung on account of riding in the back of a pick-up truck thru the city next to buses that spew black smoke from the exhaust. And I've learned to pour two buckets of water down the toilet when one just won't get the job done! I took a shower by candle light after killing the biggest cockroach I have ever seen .... Okay, I didn't kill it, but I watched and cheered; hope thats not bad karma!! Overall, I am having a great experience and asof yet, have no news of when this baby girl is going to be born. Luis joins me in a week and hopefully she will be here by then, if not, I'm taking Carla (the birth mom) on a 12 mile run and then 3 hours on the trampoline! Just kidding!

I was thinking the other day aboout what kind of mother I am going to make. I began to look back on the wonderful examples of "moms" that I've had in my life and found myself to be truly grateful for some great women in my life. First and foremost is my own mother. She and I have enjoyed a bond that has only strengthened as I've gotten older. When I was younger I did not fully appreciate the sacrifices she undertook for our family, but now I can honestly say she is my best friend. My mom, hates to be in the limelight (for those of you who know her, remember her pictionary dance?) so this posting may embarass her, but oh well!! I was once asked to write about someone I admire and I remember writing about my mom and how she always took the small fork when there were no more big forks so that the kids could have the last big fork. Small thing, I know, but made a lasting impression. Will I be able to relinquish the proverbial "big fork"? I hope so. My mom is an incredibly hard worker and is never one to complain ... much. As a matter of fact, I wish she would complain more!! Whenever I was sick, she was there with the 7-up and saltines (even to this day, when I am sick I think "I want my mommy"). I love her and will be forever grateful to her. Thanks Mom! I have been blessed to have many great examples of motherhood and as I embark on my own journey, I can look back and say thank you to these women who have shown me how to be!

Okay. So I have 8 more days until I hit the runway. It's going to be one long day. Leave Seattle at 5:30 pm and get into Guatemala City at 10:30 am the next day. I have a super long layover in Houston and have yet to convince my brother and his family to spend the wee morning hours with me in the airport. Today Luis and I spent most of the day looking for suitcases at the Goodwill and Thrift Stores. I am hesitant to borrow any because I am not sure if they will make the return trip. We found a few that will work for us. It's kind of funny to be packing for three. The rest of my week I'm sure will be doing these last minute details. I can't wait to see this little one and say "I'm your mommy". Luis has been getting into it to. Although he is nervous about changing that first diaper. Someone spilled the beans and told him that those first poops are messy and I shared the story that my brother told me about Camille (my oldest niece) and her flying mustard. He's a tad apprehensive! I told him to not fear and I will hold his hand during trial and error!

Today is the start of a new adventure! It's my first post on my brand new blog. Please bear with me as I get the kinks ironed out. I am probably the worlds worst/slowest typer and have just barely joined the technology age. Just ask my old roommates how long it took for me to hook up my voicemail on my cell phone (which was about the size of a small volkswagon) A little about what's going on... My husband, Luis, and I have been married for almost 5 years.... Wait, this goes back further than that. I started babysitting at an early age. My sister was born when I was 8, and before there were child labor laws, I was called on by my parents to watch her.... a lot. I'm not complaining, but that is what happens when you are the oldest girl-child. Mom went back to school and I had more responsibility. Mom, before you say anything, remember that this is coming from an 12 years old sense of responsibility when just emptying the dishwasher was the end of the world! So, I began picking up the occasional babysitting job from people from church, then it became a pretty regular thing as I got older. The money wasn't too bad and kept me in clothes and gas money during high school. Needless to say I was pretty busy watching babies, toddlers and those rascally 6 1nd 7 year olds. I realized that I was cut out to do this! I loved the kids! We had fun and I was loving it! Fast forward a few years and I started working as a nanny. Fell in love with each little one I watched over, I got married and we started dreaming of the family we would have one day. Needless to say, it is not too be. Various issues of the female kind have kept us from joining the ranks of new parents.
One day in february of this year, Luis got a call. His neice in Guatemala had been involved in a drive by shooting. She was ok, but found out she was pregnant. Casually, Luis said (in spanish) "why don't we take it?" to the person on the phone. My spanish is limited, but I can get the gist of a conversation. One minute after he hung up the phone, I said "no way, we live in a tiny apartment, money is tight" 5 minutes after that, I said "well, maybe" 5 minutes after that, I said "we could put the crib here" I was hooked and we started looking into it. His niece cannot care for it and the rest of the family isn't willing, so have jumped on this bandwagon!! 3 months ago we found out that "it" is a girl and have bought everything in pink, pink and more pink. And now I am days away from flying down to Gyatemala city. She is not born yet, and right now adoption laws and regulations between the US and Guatemala are tricky, so I am gearing up for a long stay. But I am coming home with her.